New beginnings   
10:09pm 22/08/2009
  I am in Boston/(Somerville).

there are brick crosswalks and dunken donuts everywhere.
bananas cost $1.29/lbs.
nothing is open 24 hours. lame.
the metro is old and kind of slow.
it's big and there's so much awesome stuff.
china town.

i like it.		  
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Reclamation   
09:37am 18/07/2009
  l think I used to be much happier. At some point quite a long time ago. Not exactly certain what happened. But I'm going to find it again.

I lied, I know exactly when and what.		  
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10:48am 14/07/2009
  I have an apartment. This is a good thing. I'm going on a roadtrip in 4 days. Also a good thing.  
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poems i like   
01:42am 02/06/2009
  Play it again, sam

made into a playlist
as subtle as spilling your beer on your lap
or a man who hasn't showered in a day
or two,
with interspersed french radio
and illogical bus ideology
how silly of you,
the fool, inverted

--

Kanazuchi

I wore my swimsuit
The day I decided to drown myself
And as I was filling
My pockets with rocks
I could see the faces
Of all my relatives
Floating down the stairs
Like blue ghosts in agony
Writhing and contorting
Into sickening grimaces
But I just hummed
And kept on picking up stones
And putting them in my pockets.


--

Marry Me Please

I didn't go anywhere
but cut down all the trees
in the backyard
and weeded all the grass
around them.
they both children,
the children went to war
and when they returned
the children bore children.
the children flood the land
and females can only take hot baths.
It will soon by over.
Perhaps grass will begin to grow.
Man will die among the grass.

--		  
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04:18pm 22/05/2009
  It occurs to me that I said I would stop this journal upon graduation, and yet just updated it. Maybe these will be my last posts. Maybe I'll update throughout this final summer if things of substantial intrigue should come to pass. The suspense must be killing you.  
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Lately   
04:14pm 22/05/2009
  My life has become insufferably cyclical. I forgot how summer brings with it both the lethargy of not having obligations as well as the depleting repetition of full-time work. I would say that I need a vacation from reality, but in truth, I'm much more anxious to simply change my reality this fall.  
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Man vs. Chimp, An Exploratory Analysis   
04:22pm 07/05/2009
  Recent news of a woman being brutally attacked by a chimpanzee has sparked  debate with my roommate over whether I could defend myself against an attacking chimpanzee or I, too, would end up mauled and handless.

In my "research" I came across two Google Answers threads entertaining the same question. Bruce Lee vs. A Chimp; who would win?. The supposition is that if any human could defeat a chimpanzee, it would be a Bruce Lee, and reversely, if he couldn't, no one could. (I would argue here that someone of sheer mass would also be formidable as their balance is less threatened and they'd have the advantage of inertia.) The Bruce Lee debate hinges on a few factors.

Strength:
Chimps naturally have significantly more relative muscle mass than humans would even be capable of physically attain. This may be surprising considering they seem small and friendly, but they're tanks.
Winner: Chimp

Speed:
This one is less established. I argue that a well trained man, such as Bruce Lee would have superior agility and reflexes than your standard chimp. I'm open to counter-arguments.
Winner: Bruce Lee

Technique: (Intelligence)
Mastery of self-defense and martial arts against a survival mechanism of ferocious biting, clawing and mauling survival defense honed over tens of thousands of years of evolution. A tough call. While a chimp could no doubt easily bite off a human's hands with their estimated 800 lbs bite force (compared with man's modest 130), this is only relevant insofar as the man gives the chimp a chance to do so. Given the vast knowledge of fighting techniques, couldn't Bruce Lee plausibly adapt his fighting style to account for this? Just like Bruce Lee could competently disarm an assailant brandishing a knife or some other weapon that he lacks, it seems possible, if not probable that he would similarly be able to neutralize the advantage of the chimps fierceness. Further, possessing vastly superior intelligence of physics, inertia and fighting styles, Bruce Lee would be able to adapt his style to take advantage of the chimps weaknesses (and strengths.)
Winner: Bruce Lee

I would add the following:

Height: Bruce Lee, 5'7. Average chimp, 4'. Bruce Lee is a short guy, but even so he has well over a foot on a chimp. A well known stratagem of war is that higher ground equals an advantage. The same can be said in fighting-- it undoubtedly gives you the increased force of gravity in downward attacks and allows for versatility of movement. Unless you're Yoda in Soul Calibur, who is in fact so short you can't grapple or hit him with most high attacks, being short offers no intrinstic advantage.
Winner: Bruce Lee

Reach: Despite height advantage the chimp has much longer arms-- which means they have the reach advantage. This, however, is slightly mitigated by considering kicking, which gives Bruce Lee a comparable range.
Winner: Chimp

Weight:
Average weight of male chimps is 90-120 lbs, 60-110 for females. Bruce Lee, between 135 and 142 at his peek. The weight advantage of Bruce Lee by 15 to 50 lbs is very significant considering it will mitigate the chimps strength advantage and prevent Lee from losing his balance should be hit.
Winner: Bruce Lee

Vulnerability
Chimps have evolved to survive without clothes. Man, on the other hand, has been hindered by thousands of years of softening under velvety layers of cotton and rayon. Essentially we're like tomatoes and they'd be more like cantalopes. Covered in thicker, rougher skin futher coated in dense hair, the chimp is much less vulnerable to injury. Humans on the other hand are fleshy and vulnerable all over, even if you're all muscle like Bruce Lee. His muscles are hard but his skin is soft. This makes us particularly prone to biting.
Winner: Chimp

The scoreboard reads:
Chimp: 3
Bruce Lee: 4

This of course means nothing. For reasons beyond the incomparability and impossibility of weighting each category. I'd say that Bruce Lee definitely has a chance based on his speed and most importantly his honed fighting skills that he can adapt to fit the enemy. Given Bruce Lee's weight and muscular build the sheer strength of the chimp is not the main concern-- Lee could handle being smacked around, assuming the chimp could land a hit. The real threat would having his fingers, or worse, bitten offen. This very possible outcome would be game over for Lee. Knowing this, if Lee could keep the chimps chompers at bay, or even better, break the jaw with a swift round-house, he could likely managed to eventually incapacitate the chimp via blows to the head and neck. The resiliance of the chimp would make this a lengthy process, increasing it's opportunities to land a bite. Such a battle could go either way, but it seems that the survival instinct of the chimp lacks the sophistication and refinement of Lee's fighter instinct which I estimate would result in his victory between 70 and 80% of the time.

I don't pay attention during class.
  
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Job Prospects   
05:50pm 04/05/2009
  Porta Bella (restaurant): applied, interviewed
Frida's (restaurant): applied, offered job, tentatively accepted. [worst decision ever?]
Gamestop: applied, will be contacted by next week
USDA Agriculture Research Services Computer Lab: applied
Starbucks: application complete, contemplating
Urban Outfitters: applying tomorrow
Cedar Creek Web Design Internship: contemplating

I need one or two jobs to get up to 40 hours a week. I really hope Porta Bella hires me. Ideally I could work there 30 hours/week and gamestop or starbucks the other 10 hours.		  
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Tying Times   
09:14am 04/05/2009
  I need to get better at tying a tie. ugh.  
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The End of Something   
05:24pm 03/05/2009
  Apart from a great short story by Hemingway, this semester is the end of something-- many things in fact. It marks the end of:
- my residence in Madison, and Wisconsin in general
- my undergraduate career
- my jobs at the herald, both as a writer and in the web department
- my job with DoIT Info Labs
- my heretofore lack of debt via student loans
- my pursuits of the Spanish and Japanese languages. I'll try to keep up with the, but no more classes.
- this livejournal. Despite three entries in a matter of minutes, I'm going to stop updating after I graduate. Sorry to the three, maybe four people that still follow it. Hah.

But it marks so many more beginnings that I am absurdly excited for. :) Maybe I'll build my own blog and keep that active..
  
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On Replacement   
05:11pm 03/05/2009
  My last post struck me as particularly Lewis Carrollian, which made me think that I should like to replace at least some of the following people: Dan Savage, Lewis Carroll, Tomioka Taeko, Earl Warren, Karen Walker.  
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On Desire   
05:08pm 03/05/2009
  If I want what I don't have
or what I can't have
why is it that I don't have what I want
when what I want is something that I could have.

everything is stupid and i hate it. the end. hah!		  
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Curious   
06:19pm 26/04/2009
  All my final paper topics for my senior year have somehow been about either sex or death. Sweet.
Now I just need to write one about sex and death. What class could that be for?		  
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"Chairs" by Tomioka Taeko   
03:07am 24/04/2009
  I greeted the human being.
At any time
I have nothig to say.
I remember seeing
a photo of a beach
where many
round wicker chairs
are arranged.
Inside those shell-like chairs
I'll greet again.
About the chairs
there was nothing more
to be said.
You will put your hand
where the space ends
and look around.
Our short
trips have no sound
at any time.
either one of us
may weep
in the air.
The chairs are
always put
back to back.
or light we are.
Don't hug me
so intimately
will you.		  
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Life Update   
05:25pm 26/03/2009
  School is almost over and it can't come soon enough. I hate most of my classes and I don't even know how I'm doing in most of them.
I'm very ready for summer. And law school.
I hate being single. It was refreshing and fun for the first few months but now I'm just sick of it. And kind of lonely. But I made this decision knowingly-- there's no point in any relationship because I'm leaving the city in a few months. Plus there's no one around that I'm interested in either. Still.
I ran 10 miles this week. Biked 4.
It needs to be warmer out again. I want to fix my bike. I want to bike to the Asian grocery store more regularly. That place is fun.		  
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Law Schools   
08:13pm 27/02/2009
  So I finally have heard back from all the schools. I had heard back from the initial five since December, but I applied to Michigan at the end of December, so it took a while to hear back from there. I got into all but Michigan, incidentally. They contacted me today saying I was waitlisted, which although better than being rejected, is essentially a "you're probably not good enough." Honestly this was pretty expected-- I wasn't even going to apply, and initially didn't because I figured I couldn't get in. My parents convinced me to, and even payed the application fee, so I did. Granted, applying so late surely didn't help my chances of getting in, I doubt that affected the outcome much. On one hand, it's never a good feeling to be rejected, but I'm also glad I applied to at least one top tier school, even if it meant getting rejected, so I wouldn't be left wondering what my limits really were. Another benefit of this is that it spares me the agonizing decision between BU (the school I want to go to) and U.Michigan (the better school). Essentially this works out better for the interest of my happiness, perhaps at the slight expense of my future success. I'll complete the waitlist form, but for all practical purposes am considering this a rejection, leaving me at a final decision to attend Boston University School of Law. It's a very proud, momentous occassion, and only a little bitter-sweet.
  
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Lately   
12:25pm 25/02/2009
  I have not felt anything. And it's becoming rather disconcerting. It's not depression, I just don't seem to have emotional reactions to anything anymore. I used to have a few at least.
  
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The Gay Community   
12:21pm 25/02/2009
  Is rather sad. Mostly it is just gay men acting as if there were nothing but mindless, sex-driven automata, taking turns making out with each other. And I wonder if they are really that horny, or just trying to fill an emptiness inside them via someone else's tongue. Either way, I don't much enjoy such outings as last night's Big Gay Mardi Gras Affair, as it shall hence be referred to until it is soon forgotten.  
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01:51pm 22/02/2009
  My feeling about leaving Madison are very mixed.

On one hand, I can't wait to get out of this frozen wasteland invested with the intellectual dregs of society, smartly clad in sweats and furry-boots. I can't wait to move on to the next chapter of my life, to live in a metropolis again, to re-boot my life.

But then I think about all the people that, practically speaking, I'll probably never see again. Sure, I'll maintain several of the most important relationships, but many won't last. Many are already fading and this pisses me off. I can rationalize it all day about how everything is transient, and people float out of our lives just as unexpectedly as they drift in. And while I honestly do believe that, it does little remove tinge of sadness.		  
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Debauchery   
09:58am 29/01/2009
  I've been a really bad student so far  in this, the last semester of my undergraduate career.

I've also been spending way too much money (at the bars). That needs to stop.		  
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thesasseffect
 
 
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